The Mis-Conceptions of Food Waste, and Value

Food Waste

I did a tabling event at a children’s museum this past weekend for We Don’t Waste. Tabling, also called The Speakers Bureau, involves interacting and engaging with the visitors, giving them information about We Don’t Waste, and educating them on our mission and why it’s important.

My pitch goes something like this:

“We rescue food that would have otherwise ended up in landfills from places like grocery stores, bakeries, restaurants, and sports stadiums, and distribute it to the community through mobile food markets, and partnerships with organizations like shelters, food pantries, and farms. Last year we rescued over 24 million servings of food which helped feed over 700,000 people.”

Most people nod and get the gist. A small percentage of people have heard of We Don’t Waste and are familiar with the problem food waste in this country poses (over 40% of food in the U.S. ends up in landfills where it rots and produces methane gas). But one lady asked me, “So, do you like dig in the garbage for food to find what’s still good?” A valid question because, well, “food waste.” What does that make you think of? It made me wonder how many other people might have that same question but were just too afraid to ask it. It is the reason I hate the term food waste.

The answer to her question is no. The food we distribute is in perfectly good condition, and comes directly off the shelves of bakeries, or straight from the freezers at grocery stores. A better term might be “excess food that stores know they are not going to sell and are going to throw away but is actually still of high quality and definitely edible.” But it would be hard to start a global campaign around that. So we use “food waste.”

Here are some pictures of the food we are saving and re-distributing. These are pictures from a mobile food market this past week.

Cream Cheese, Pistachios

Frozen Ground Beef

Assortment of Bread and Misc

So there’s two big disconnects that we are fighting against in this movement. 

The first is our perception of food waste. When we think of that phrase we automatically picture food in the garbage, or an unfinished plate, or maybe something rotten and inedible. And that’s understandable. But as the pictures above show, “food waste” is anything but. 

A couple of years ago I worked part time (very part time) on a farm in Los Angeles. One day we were harvesting carrots. We had two bins. Carrots destined for the market went into one bin. Carrots destined for the compost went into another bin. The difference? Appearance. The compost carrots were ugly and the farmer I worked for knew for that reason they wouldn’t sell. Just another example of how our programming of what food should look like has turned food, into waste. Think about that the next time you’re at the grocery store or the farmers market, and you put an apple down because it has a bruise, or choose a different potato without a spore, or pass over the soft avocado. We’re conditioned to pick perfect produce.   

The second disconnect is what is actually causing the degradation of our environment and our health. One of the guys I volunteer with has been vegan for 20 years. When he told me that I replied, “Twenty years, that must be hard.”

“Not when you’re doing it for the right reasons,” he replied. “Like animal welfare and the impact on the environment.”

Is farming ruining the planet, or is the way we farm ruining the planet? If we can produce so much food in this country that over 40 percent of it goes to waste, then perhaps there’s something wrong in the methodology. If 40 percent of food goes to waste, then 40 percent of the resources used to grow that food are going to waste (energy, water, and money). If the food industry can waste 40 percent of food and still turn a profit, then it should call into question the “methods” and “techniques” (if you can call them that) that they are using. Massive fields of monoculture agriculture doused in pesticides might produce a large yield, but it’s decimating the soil and the land, and our health. 

I just finished reading Silo, written by chef Douglas McMaster who owns a restaurant of the same name. They are the world’s first zero waste restaurant. The book is a “how to” for anyone looking to reduce the waste they create. At the end of the book he sums it up pretty perfectly. 

“Zero waste is nature. To achieve zero waste is to integrate with nature. It has everything we desire and there needs to be no compromise.”

Zero waste is nature. We’re disconnected from nature. The biggest disconnect that encompasses all of the others. 

Nothing of Value

Spam email is a great example of what happens when something costs nothing. Companies can send out their “newsletter” to thousands of people for next to nothing. And even if they get 1% of people to click, it’s worth it to them. So they flood our emails with their latest nonsense. Just one more way we are all so distracted.

I ordered hydrogen tabs recently after learning about them on a Joe Rogan podcast. $30 for a 30 day supply seemed like a good bet to test them out. Today I recieved a newsletter from the company. 

I can’t even tell you what it said because I unsubscribed and deleted it immediately. I was just looking for a hydrogen tab to test the reported health benefits. I didn’t ask for a newsletter from a company that manufactures hydrogen tabs. 

But everyone thinks they have something intelligent to say (ahem)…

And now with AI not only does the email cost nothing, but you don’t even have to produce the content. 

Me: “Compose a newsletter that tells people why hydrogen tabs are beneficial to their health.”

ChatGPT: “Sure! Here's a draft for a newsletter that promotes the health benefits of hydrogen tablets in a friendly, informative tone:

Subject Line: Unlock the Power of Hydrogen – A Simple Tab for Better Health

Header: Say Hello to Better Health with Hydrogen Tabs

Body:
Did you know the smallest molecule in the universe could be your biggest health upgrade?

Hydrogen tablets—tiny but mighty—are changing the way we support wellness from the inside out. When dropped into water, these tabs release molecular hydrogen (H₂), a powerful antioxidant that helps your body fight oxidative stress, reduce inflammation, and boost cellular health.

Here’s what hydrogen tabs can do for you:

• Combat oxidative stress – Molecular hydrogen targets harmful free radicals, which may reduce signs of aging and improve recovery after exercise.

• Support energy and mental clarity – Users often report improved focus and stamina with regular use.

• Promote gut health and hydration – Hydrogen-rich water is gentle on the digestive system and may support gut balance.

• Anti-inflammatory effects – Preliminary studies show benefits in reducing chronic inflammation and supporting immune function.

No pills, no powders, just a clean tablet that transforms your water—and your wellness routine.

Ready to feel the difference?
Drop one tab in water. Drink daily. Discover the benefits.

[Shop Hydrogen Tabs Now]

Stay healthy,
The [Your Brand Name] Team”

Technology has done some amazing things, but creating cheap products and services of no value to infiltrate our lives, and distract us, has not been one of them. And in a lot of ways it is the same issue we face with food waste.

Intuition vs. Resistance

Everyone has two voices. Which one do you listen to more? 

Voice 1 says: let’s cook.

Voice 2 says: let’s just order pizza, its been a long day. It would be so much easier.

Voice 1 says: let’s go to the gym.

Voice 2 says: you just got home from work, relax a little bit, unwind. You deserve it.

Voice 1 says: let’s read.

Voice 2 says: ok, but let’s check our phone first.

Voice 1 says: you know what would be really nice, if I bought my partner a nice set of earrings for her new piercings.

Voice 2 says: earrings are expensive, we’ve been spending too much money recently. Also, I don’t know which ones to get. Let’s do something else, something simpler, and cheaper. 

There’s so many conversations that take place in our heads every day. One voice is telling us what we need to be doing. It’s guiding us along our path towards our best life. The other voice is coming up with every excuse under the sun to convince you not to do it. It’s too risky. You’ve never done it before. You have time, it doesn’t need to be done today. 

Which voice are you listening to?

Listen to your first one, that’s your truth. Ignore the second one, that’s your resistance.

Taking Inventory of What Works and What Doesn’t

When I’m feeling off, I want to know why that is so I can fix it. What’s going on in my environment to cause it. I try to figure it out because in our every changing world that’s full of distractions, stress, controversy, and temptations, I like to know what’s going on with me. I think it’s the only way to stay sane and healthy.

So maybe I missed a workout. Or maybe I haven’t done the activity that I’ve been wanting to do. Like go skiing or hiking. Maybe I need to pick up the phone and call a friend or a loved one. Maybe I’m missing that connection that can only come from a familiar voice. It could be that I’ve been indulging too much in foods outside of my normal diet. Poor quality foods that contribute to poor sleep, poor workouts, and poor moods. And once I’ve done my assessment, and figured out what’s going on, I get to work on making changes. 

I try to act on what I believe to be the culprit. It doesn’t always take right away. Sometimes it takes a few days. Sometimes I’ll have a bunch of starts and stops.

Like with diet, which is easy to visualize. I might realize that I’ve been having too much dairy. I’m pretty lactose intolerant. The only dairy I can really tolerate Is Greek yogurt. Problem is I love cheese, milk, and rich yogurt with the buttermilk cream on top. So it’s very easy for me to throw caution to the wind and indulge, only to find myself not feeling great, and not realizing how I get there. Until I start assessing it.

Sugar is another good example. In my normal routine I don’t consume added sugar. But if I go on vacation I always allow myself to indulge in sweet treats. Problem is sugar cravings don’t stay abroad. They follow you home. It can take a week to 10 days to wean off sugar and kick those cravings. All the while not realizing why I feel so lousy. It takes that internal assessment to realize what’s going on.

Sleep is another good one. I read this quote, “if you don’t know what it is you need, it’s probably sleep.” So true. I think about that one all of the time when I’m going through my assessment. Nine out of ten times when nothing else is working, it’s sleep that I need.

It works in the opposite direction as well. When I’m feeling really good and full of energy I like to understand why so I can keep it going and replicate it in the future. Usually when I’m feeling good it’s because I’ve foubd a good cadence with my workouts. Not too intense to leave me drained, but intense enough to feel accomplished and see results. 

Lately the best days have been ones that start with writing. Whether that’s stream of conscious writing that clears my head, or jotting down more thought out ideas like this one. I find that how I start my day is the biggest indicator to how my day will go.

If I get time to myself to write or read or exercise, then my day generally goes pretty smoothly. My mood and energy levels stay pretty stable. Conversely, if I start my day by picking up my phone or opening my laptop, the rest of my day is a struggle. In the former I’m getting to engage with my mind or my body first. In the later I’m at the mercy of whatever pops up on the screen, and most of the time it’s not good. Most of the time it’s something that sets off my emotions and my adrenaline and dumps a bunch of cortisol into my veins.

I think that while this might sound like a lot of work to constantly be analyzing, it is the only way to live your best life in a chaotic world filled with temptation and distraction. There are so many inputs that are out of our control that we need to understand how they are all impacting us if we want to be our best. 

If you’re doing it right it becomes easier. If you do it often you start to recognize patterns (like the ones I mentioned above). The more often you notice them the quicker you’ll be at identifying them, and the better you’ll be at eliminating things (activities, foods, people) that no longer serve you. Which also makes more room for things that do. 

I realized a few years ago that alcohol no longer served me, so I gave it up. I realized a few years ago that triathlons no longer served me, so I stopped training for them. The void left by alcohol made room for psychedelic substances that have helped me physically, mentally, and emotionally break through many barriers. The time I was spending training for triathlons is now spent strength training (my first true love), and writing. Two activities that I have found a lot more rewarding.

The people I’ve cut out, the social media I’ve deleted, has allowed me to foster better relationships with the people closest to me.

I think that in today’s world there is just so much that we all need to consider each day. And if we’re not constantly doing honest assessments of where we are, then it’s very easy to end up down a path we don’t want to be down. The distractions and temptations are too much and too abundant. We need to be vigilant keepers of what’s making us feel better and what’s not. And we need to do more of the former and none of the latter. 

The Behavior of Change

Thoughts and download from the week.

---

At a minimum, there’s two things you can learn from other people. What to do and what not to do.

Sports

I like watching endurance sports like the UFC (MMA), cycling, or even motorcycle racing like MotoGP. To me these are the hardest sports because they require the athlete to remain focused on their technique over long periods of time, well after fatigue and pain have set in. And I think that dynamic adds a different level to the athlete and the sport that you don’t get from other sports. 

I also like watching them because it makes you realize what the human body is capable of. When two UFC fighters go five hard rounds all bloodied and battered, it makes you realize just how far you really can push it. 

When cyclists race for the finish line on day 21 of the Tour de France, or when a MotoGP rider all of a sudden finds a new best lap time as the races comes to the end, you really understand what it means to push it. 

And I try to use that in my normal life to do shit I don’t want to do. Whether that’s working out or sitting down to write, I ask myself what one of those guys would do if they were me. And of course it always makes me do it.

I also love these sports because they are international. You get to see the best of the best from around the world, representing their country, their history, and their culture. That also brings a different element to the sport. 

And I guess lastly, it’s that they’re individual sports, supported by a dedicated team of people, which allows you to get to know the athlete on a far more intimate level. And for me, it’s a lot easier to get behind an individual than it is a team. 

We hold the answers that we seek. 

You can have a bad idea without all of your ideas being bad. I think that’s the trap. Believing that because you made a mistake you’re just going to keep making mistakes, so, instead of trusting your gut, you start to distrust it. And, the result is an inability to make progress. Because you get stuck questioning everything your gut is telling you to do. 

Or, you’re just too afraid. You’re too scared and can’t see how an action plays out on the other side, and you second guess yourself. You delay gratifying that urge, you get stuck in delay.

That was one of the most profound things I’d heard in a long time. I had just begun toying with the idea that being able to follow my intuition would be the key to my success. The key to living a happy and fruitful life. But I did not have anything to base it on other than my own thoughts and experiences. 

I found, simply enough, that on days when I was able to lead with my gut, that my days were happier, they were more care free, and they went smoothly. It was a feeling for which I had no concrete examples, I just knew I felt better. 

Jen and I went out to dinner one night with friends. There business partner who happened to be visiting from Italy joined us. Over dinner Jen and I got to know him, and we learned what a successful and intelligent man he was. 

At one point in the evening we were all talking when he leaned in and said, “I’ve found that the most successful people I know, don’t spend a lot of time in delay. If they want a boat, they buy a boat. If they want to paint their house green, they paint their house green.”

It was so profound to me because in that moment I found context in what I had been feeling and unable to describe. And it was coming out of the mouth of someone who, in a short amount of time, I had gained a lot of respect for. 

Delay is the word that I grapple with. Not wanting to delay, but not wanting to do something stupid. Or do something I’ll later regret. But I’ve found that the only way to ever really know is to do it. And hope for the best. 

On the evening before Jen and I’s first trip together, she asked me what I was writing in my journal. I said, jokingly, “I hope it goes well.” We both laughed hard, and that’s been an inside joke for us ever since. But it’s also kind of been a motto we live by, or at least try to live by. 

“I hope it goes well” kind of sums up the only expectation you can set. Because it can not go well, and sometimes it doesn’t, but, with the right intentions, most of the time it does. 

Which comes back to the initial thought. You can make mistakes without everything you do becoming a mistake. Even if you’ve made a few mistakes. I think there’s always a path waiting if you’re willing to silence the noise around you and really tune into your gut. 

You have to clean up the environment around you.  You have to be aware of what you’re consuming. And you have to filter through the distractions, and eliminate the ones that don’t serve your purpose.

Following our intuition for life is the thing that I think we’re missing the most, and we’re more scared than ever to do it. Mainly, I think, because our environment is so littered with garbage at every turn, that we’re just not able to tune in to ourselves. 

Judging

The thing I judge people the most harshly about is not doing the things they want. And it’s probably because that’s when I’m the harshest critic of myself. When I think about something I want to do and then don’t follow through on it. Or find myself a year later, two years later, three years later, still talking about that thing and never having done it. That is for sure the thing that pisses me off the most, and it’s the thing that can keep me trapped in my head the most.

Because when I’m not acting on something I want, or something I want to do or try, that’s when I feel the most stuck. So, when I see it or hear it from other people, it causes the biggest reaction from me. Because I don’t want them to sit with that stuck feeling, the way I have so many times.

I know how awful that stuck feeling is, and I also know how liberating it is, and euphoric even, when you finally do the thing you’ve been thinking about and wanting to do. In my experience, it doesn’t always mean going full fledged and making it happen right away even. Sometimes just exploring the idea more fully, and allowing it to spread its wings, going from a thought to a possibility, can be enough. 

There’s been times when there’s something I want to do that’s eating away at me, and then when I go and actually explore it, I realize I didn’t want it in the first place. But I needed to do the work so I could clear my mind. 

I just feel like too many people with the means to change their life never do. And they sit stuck with what ifs in their mind that were never given the chance to become possibilities. And I think a life spent that way is the ultimate waste, and the saddest. 

Stop saying this is the best time to be alive.

Who’s it the best time for? Not the people in Gaza. Not the people in Syria. Not the people in Ukraine. Not the people in North Korea. Not the people in Venezuela. Not the people in much of Africa. Not the nearly 5 million innocent people who have been killed either by direct or indirect warfare in the middle east since 9/11. Not the hundred of thousands of homeless and drug addicted people living in the richest country in the world. Not the 50+ million people who don’t have enough nutritious food to be healthy, stress free, and prosperous. And not the many more who suffer on the fringe both here in America and around the world, who’s storied we don’t even know about because they aren’t dire enough to make the news.

So who is it the best time to be alive for? The people that say it. The people that have the privilege of believing that. 

Perhaps it is the best time for information. The best time for resources. The best time for medicine. The best time for innovation. But despite that, there remains a significant portion of the population, the overwhelmingly majority in fact, who’s not the best time to be alive.

So again, please stop saying it is the best time to be alive because there are billions of people around the world who would argue against that, and be right. 

In fact I would argue that for anyone who’s conscious, awake, aware, and paying attention, that it is actually the worst time to be alive. To be able to see so clearly the possibilities and watch how they are undermined and squandered at every turn by greedy, maniacal, and heartless people with zero morals, ethics, or integrity.

Yes, for those of us paying attention, there has never been a worse time to be alive.

Two random thoughts

If you start with the assumption that everyone is actually good, then you can start to try and figure out where they went wrong that made them not so. But if you start with the assumption that everyone is bad, then you automatically dismiss them, and there’s nothing to try and figure out. 

News is actually just gossip. They’re just telling you what someone did, or what some country did, or what some group did, the same way a friend, colleague, or family member might. They’re not telling you why or even interested in knowing why, the same way a friend, colleague, or family member wouldn’t. They’re only interested in spreading the gossip and hijacking your attention and your emotions.

The Behavior of Change

Sunday Scaries. Thoughts and download from the week.

---

Grasshoppers

I learned that grasshoppers have a gear like mechanism in their legs that enables them to jump. Facts like these remind me why it’s important to question everything. In all my years of life, I never considered that the use of gears was not unique to humans. For 37 years I’ve been walking around misinformed. What other information am I taking at face value in my life? Where else am I holding onto a belief based on wrong information or information I have yet to learn? These are the types of questions I like to ask myself, and every time I learn something new, like this, it reminds me that there is still so much I don’t know, and everything should be questioned.

Enjoy your health

I was listening to a podcast recently with two nutritionists discussing diet, exercise, and health. I’m a big fan of the guest, the reason I tuned in, but the host I’d never heard of. I’ll call her Mary.

Mary said a lot of things that I didn’t agree with. I didn’t like her choice of words, or the message she was conveying. Fortunately she was sharing the stage with someone who knew what they were talking about so she was able to correct her.

But the thing that really bothered me was her insinuation that eating “healthy,” akakthe real way to eat, was boring. My god, if this lady is your nutritionist, then I feel really bad for you.

The way she said it, insinuated that things like fast food, take out, or frozen meals, were exciting. There is nothing exciting about any of those. Particularly when they make up the majority of your diet. They are poison, and are only appealing because they are cheap, accessible, and convenient.

A rancher at a conference a few weeks ago said, “our addiction to convenience is killing us.” He’s right.

If this lady knew anything about food, nutrition, or cooking, then she would know that there is nothing more exciting then stepping into your kitchen, opening the refrigerator, looking in the pantry, peaking around in the spice cabinet, and figuring out what ingredients you have and what you can make from them. Deciding what to eat based on how you’re feeling that day, or what your activity level was, and then catering a meal to those needs.

That’s fun, and exciting.

If you don’t have time to cook, let’s work on finding the time. If you can’t afford to grocery shop and cook healthy foods, let’s figure out ways to make cooking affordable and accessible. 

But please, for the love of god, don’t fucking tell me that eating healthy is boring. Yes, I crave foods from time to time that are outside of my repertoire of cooking skills and ingredient list, but those instance are few and far between. I prepare very close to every meal I eat during the week, and I enjoy the hell out of 99 percent of them.

After you’ve eaten this way for long enough, you learn what you like, what you don’t, what tastes good, and what doesn’t, and you learn how to make what you want and need. I’ve gotten to the point where eating out has become the disappointing thing to do. I typically leave a meal out thinking, “I should’ve just eaten at home.” 

Eating healthy is only boring when you don’t know what you’re doing. And clearly Mary doesn’t have a clue.

Lawn

I never mow the lawn in the same pattern. I mowed the lawn today, differently from two weeks ago, which was different from the two weeks before that. 

Today I split the front lawn down the middle length wise, and then attacked each half individually. Usually I start on the perimeter, ride the edge, and then form a pattern from there. Sometimes going in a circle. Sometimes focusing on each quadrant individually. Other times just completely making it up as I go, probably looking like a mad man, or someone who has never mowed the lawn before (both could be true).

In the back I started with what I’d describe as a candy cane shape. I took the long far side first, which is in the shape of a candy cane, and followed that to the end. I kept that pattern going back and forth. It was fun to be mowing in that shape, and it actually turned out to be pretty efficient. It was probably the fastest I’ve got done mowing since we moved in.

But the thing is, when I look at my neighbors lawns, all I see is straight rows. They look like they’re so methodical about it. They have a set pattern. They know the most efficient way, and they know what they want their lawn to look like, and so they’ve adopted the same pattern over and over.

When their lawn is mowed, it looks orderly and clean. The way my rug looks after I’ve vacuumed it. Whereas mine kind of looks like my hair after I’ve just given myself a haircut.

But, the more fascinating thing I’ve realized lately, is that I’ve been using the weed whacker incorrectly for the last 3.5 months. Since June I’ve struggled trying to figure out the best angle, and height, to keep the thread at so that it edges properly. But I couldn’t figure it out. Last time I edged the lawn I switched hand positions [read: non-dominant dominant]. I put the handle of the edger in my right hand, and used my left as the guide. Switching hands turned me in the opposite direction. Come to find out, that’s the direction the edger is supposed to face. Nothing wrong with my technique, per se, just holding the tool backwards. Even edger’s are apparently made for righties.

Where else in my life am I struggling because I’m holding the tool backwards?

My role

Recently I’ve been thinking about the role I play in a given situation. In particular unsuccessful ones. The easiest example is like when an unintended emotional trigger gets pulled in either my girlfriend or I, and we delve into an argument. In those situations, even if she’s wrong [;)], once things have cooled off I like to ask myself “What role did I play in the descent into chaos? How could a different action, word, facial expression, or body position, have changed the outcome of that conversation?” And then I try to remember that for the next time.

Which means, in order to be effective, I also have to figure out the signs that things are about to get hairy. Is there a certain feeling I can identify that gets triggered before an argument happens? Is there certain body language or words that she starts to use that I could look out for that’ll signal what’s to come, and trigger me to change my approach? What are those signs, and can I remember to change my actions and reactions in time to save the conversation, and ultimately our day.

What role can I play to improve outcomes, even if it means sacrificing how I “feel?”

Something to listen to

Elizabeth Gilbert — How to Set Strong Boundaries, Overcome Purpose Anxiety, and Find Your Deep Inner Voice (#770) - If you’re a male listening to this, and it feels to feminishy, just give it a chance. Actually, if you feel that way, it’s probably a sign you should keep listening. For awhile I’ve believed that to be your best self you need to be your unapologetically real self, and that’s what she talks about. At least that’s my interpretation. And while I haven’t achieved that yet, it’s a great conversation that gives you permission to pursue it.

The Joe Rogan Experience - #2207 Shawn Ryan - I just enjoyed this conversation because Shawn Ryan really seems like a down to earth guy whos curious about life and what’s going on. There is no agenda. Much like Rogan. Their conversation spans across multiple topics and I thought Shawn brought a really good perspective to just about everything discussed.

Runs and Hikes

Eldorado Canyon State Park - Continental Divide Overlook via Fowler to Rattlesnake Gulch Loop - This was harder than I anticipated when I set out for my run. I don’t know if it was just the heat, or what, but it wrecked me. It’s a steady gain all the way to the top, which makes for a pleasant descent. I liked how accessible the trail is, and the views are beautiful. I ran it during the week and there was very little traffic on the trail. Parking was also a breeze.

Rocky Mountain National Park - Sky Pond, The Loch, and Timberline Falls, via Glacier Gorge Loop - This was my first trip back to Rocky Mountain NP in over 5 years, and a lot has changed. In 2019 I hiked to Sky Pond. I was able to easily park at the Bear Lake Trail. On this trip we needed a time entry permit, and when we got to the Bear Lake Trail lot we were turned around by park rangers because the lot was full. We parked about a mile from the trail head, turning our 10 mile hike into 12 miles. Sky Pond is beautiful, but the park and route felt like an amusement park, with scores of people everywhere. If you’re looking for a more wild experience, I’d recommend heading somewhere else.

Golden Gate Canyon State Park - Panorama Point via Mule Deer and Raccoon Trail - Golden Gate Canyon has become one of my favorite places to hike and run. It’s accessible, beautiful, and not overly crowded. Most trails also have a lot of coverage from the sun, like this one. Views are beautiful and the trails are well maintained. I highly recommend this park.

Things that stuck with me

“We always talk about learning disabilities, but we never talk about teaching disabilities”

The Behavior of Change

Things I’m thinking about

---

On being happy

I think part of being happy is realizing that you can be happy even if you don’t have everything you want yet. I thought that once I did X, that would make me happy, and I could relax, and stop looking so far forward. But I realized tonight, that for the first time in my life, I’m happy, and there’s so many things I want, and rather than cause anxiety, it excites me.

Coincidentally or not, I read this quote this morning which nails it:

“Desire is the contract that you make with yourself to be unhappy until you get what you want.” - Naval Ravikant

For some reason, I no longer feel the pressure of making sure X will happen. Instead I know it will happen. It might not happen how I thought it would. It might end up looking different than what I envisioned. But I have finally realized that, regardless of when, how, what, I can still enjoy the present moment. 

I read this quote as well which also came at an opportune moment:

“‘Success’ sells this kind of ultimate destination when - even though I’ve accomplished something, and you [Tim] have accomplished something - I told you I was crying last night. It’s not like, ‘I’m done, I’ve arrived’ or anything like that.” — Sophia Amoruso as told to Tim Ferriss, Tools of Titans

Riding my bike the other day I realized that this whole time I’ve been afraid to start on my path because I was expecting some finished version of myself, and that once I reached that point, I would be ready to begin the work. But it struck me riding around the lake outside my house, that that will never be the case. Who I am, what my beliefs, routines, habits, likes and dislikes, are today, are not the same as yesterday, and will not be the same as tomorrow. As long as I’m continuing to learn, seek knowledge, grow, and evolve, I’m never going to have a “finished product” to present to anyone, so the work needs to start now. And the work is the journey.

It was a powerful realization for me, to know that I can be happy now, and beginning working now, knowing that there more to come.

Opportunities

There is no such thing as a missed opportunity. There are only false starts, delays, and detours.

I’ve really been thinking deeper about this idea that everyone has a path laid out for them, buried within their intuition, and the key to reaching your full potential and achieving happiness lies in your ability to dial into it.

When I think about this theory, it makes me realize that there are no such things as missed opportunities. Your path is your path and nothing will change that. Every “missed” chance presents an equal opportunity to make it right somewhere else down the line. You just need to be open to seeing it, and willing to act when the time is right. I’ve noticed it countless times in my own life, where it’s felt like an opportunity to feel better, to make up with someone, to invest, to learn something new, has passed by, only to see each one of those things resolve themselves in some other, sometimes unexpected, manner.

The point is, don’t regret or stress missed opportunities. Instead, seek the next opportunity you see.

Shifting views

If you believe that the way you were raised has had an impact on your view of the world, then you must also believe that it is possible to change your view of the world. If, you grew up in a balanced home, then you would likely approach situations from a balanced perspective. If, you grew up in a home that valued fruits and vegetables, then you would likely enjoy eating fruits and vegetables. And if you grew up in a house full of books, then you would likely love to read.

Our view is what shapes our world, and it is possible to change our view with just a little work. First, understand that you can. Second, understand that you will. Maybe not today, tomorrow, the next day, or the day after that. But if you keep at it, then at some point, it will change. And if you pay close enough attention, you’ll find that small things around you will begin to change before anyone else even notices it.

Accounting for phone usage

It’s really not possible to spend less time on your phone than you currently are right now. The problem is what you’re doing during that time. If you have social media, an inbox full of newsletters and promotional emails, notifications for “breaking news,” then, to be blunt, you’re really just wasting your time.

There is so much you can do with a phone, and we only use 10% of its capabilities (I made that stat up but I bet it’s close). It’s much like our brains. We only use a small portion, the rest is left untapped (although I read somewhere recently that that’s being challenged). What could you be doing with your time?

Researching that idea you had. Starting an online blog. Using your notes for journaling. Looking up a fun workout, or recipe. 

There are so many other things you could be doing. But you’re not, so none of what you want is happening.

A few months ago I made a decision to exit the world of click-bait news, and social media, which marked a turning point in my life.

I was inspired by a quote I heard on an episode of the Tim Ferriss Show. It was something like, “I decided I wanted to stop being on top of things, and start getting to the bottom of things.” In that moment something clicked, and my whole approach to news and social media was flipped.

I thought that by reading news articles I was being smart, and I was figuring things out. But all I ever felt after reading articles was angry and frustrated. Angry that the “journalists” did a bullshit job of reporting, and frustrated that what they were “reporting” on was never going to be resolved. And the information I was learning, wasn’t new, and it was of little value. I learned talking points, instead of the truth.

Social media on the other hand, was a no-brainer for me. I’m fortunate to be blessed with an allergy to social media. The mere sight of it, or mention of it, gives me anxiety. It’s always felt dirty to me and so by this point social media and I were already on the outs. I had deleted it all once before, and it lured me back. But I knew it was time to break free for good.

Now when I’m on my phone I’m spending the time on myself. I’m researching an idea. Writing down a thought. Looking up a good restaurant. Planning for an upcoming trip. Recording videos for my YouTube Channel. Texting my friends and loved ones.

Very often I’ll still pick up my phone just looking for something to distract, but there’s nothing there. No social media to open. No news to read. No inbox full of emails to scroll through and delete. So I’ll sit staring at my phone forcing myself to remember what I wanted to work on. “ahhh, I wanted to look up that hike my dentist told me about. Let me do that now.”

Worst Case Scenario

In any situation I try to imagine the worst case scenario, and then decide if I can live with it, and/or how to mitigate the chances of it happening. 

Two recent examples.

We bought a plastic skeleton to sit on the basketball hoop above our driveway. I don’t have a ladder tall enough to reach it. So, my thought was to back in my girlfriend’s pickup, and put the ladder I do have, in the bed of the truck to reach it. 

Immediately it sounded dangerous, and I thought, what’s the worst that could happen? I could fall and get seriously injured. Can I live with that? I could, but I’d prefer not to. So, how to mitigate it?

Take my time. Don’t rush. Don’t get frustrated. Ask my girlfriend to stand in the truck with me and hold the ladder. ✅ 

A friend of mine is buying a building and he reached out asking if I was interested in investing. I’ve invested in properties with him a number of times in the past with good returns. 

He offered three options. Straight equity, equity plus preferred interest, and straight interest. I decided to go with straight equity. I thought it’d be nice to have a long term investment in my portfolio. 

But the amount I was committing to was less than he wanted for an equity partner, and he asked if I’d be okay with doubling it. 

I immediately thought what’s the worst case scenario. I’m not concerned with losing the investment, although that is always a possibility, even if a far out one. My concern in this case, the worst case scenario, is not having the funds when I go to buy my own property. So, I started thinking about what I could do to mitigate that happening. 

I could opt instead for straight interest with the initial amount I offered, which wouldn’t be as exciting, but would still be double the interest earned in a high yield savings account. I could sell some stocks if I needed to buy my own property, which I’d likely have to do anyway. I could start earning income in the next 6-12 months, around the timeline for buying a property. ✅ 

I always find that thinking “worst case scenario” is a good mental exercise. I think by picturing the worst possible outcome we can mitigate risk, help set expectations, and hopefully come out better on the other side.

Principles for life

I think there are four keys to life that we’re not really ever made aware of. I think these four keys are paramount to experiencing success in your life, however you choose to define it. I think these four principles are necessary to achieving your goals and making dreams a reality.

Permission to do it - I’ve been suffering from a nagging injury for 5 years. I went to a new physical therapist/masseuse when I got to Colorado. He told me not to become a recurring client. He told me I need to do the work every day. He gave me permission to heal myself, instead of relying on someone like him to do it for me.

Understanding of how to do it - He, along with another therapist, gave me a lot of exercises that helped me get better. The exercises they gave me led to an understanding of how the body moves, which I was able to use to continue finding new exercises to help me heal.

Knowledge that it’s possible - I’ve watched countless professional athletes get over terrible injuries. My injury was not a career ending one, but it was an acute injury turned chronic. I knew that with enough time, I would heal. I knew it was possible if I could just figure out the puzzle.

Confidence to do it - Confidence or determination, I’m not sure which one. Perhaps both. But over the last 5 years never once did I believe I couldn’t figure out the missing link that would get me back to 100 percent. I’d say I’m at about 80 percent, and closing in quick.

Five things you can do right now to immediately gain an edge over 99% of the population, and join the new 1%:

1. Giver yourself space to think. Delete all of your social media, including LinkedIn.

2. Find time to exercise. Do push ups immediately upon waking up every morning. Do 1 repetition short of failure.

3. Clear your bed by writing. Something, anything, into a notebook or journal before going to bed. “I don’t know what to write so I’m just writing I don’t know what to write,” counts.

4. Fix your diet, feed your cells. Eliminate all added sugar from your life. All added sugar. Eat as much fruit as you want. 

5. Exercise your brain by reading. Commit to one page per day. 

On the benefits of being selfish

Most of what I do is for selfish reasons. I try to get as much done as possible in the house before my girlfriend comes homes from work, so this way she has nothing to do when she gets home.

I don’t do it for her though. I mean I do, but the real reason I do it is because when she gets home all I want to do is spend time with her and unwind. And if she has to run around getting things done, then we never get to really connect. By the time we’re both decompressed, it’s bed time.

So, I do my best to make sure everything is in order. Plants watered ✅. Kitchen clean ✅. Trash and recycling ✅. Dog walked ✅. Dinner ready ✅. And now we get to spend time together.

Most of what I do is for reasons such as this. Self-ish ones that really have my interests at heart but look outwardly real, nice, and genuine.

My intentions are good. But they’re just intended for me.

Which maybe says something about where I’m at in my life right now. Where my self-ish reasons seem to align with everything that’s good, fun, and enjoyable in my life. And even if not for the same reasons as one might assume, good stuff is getting done.

What’s the one thing you’re ignoring that you know you need to do?

And what are you doing to change that?

What is the one thing that you have been putting off doing for a long time? Say, greater than or equal to 3 months. What is that one thing on your mind that you keep brushing off as unnecessary, but always comes back? It doesn’t matter why you’re not doing it. It could be because you’re afraid. Because it might be expensive. Because you’re scared of the outcome. It could be you don’t know how to do it. No one ever showed you how. You don’t know what the first step looks like. It could be something that puts you out of your way. Or conjures up feelings of anxiety. Or you think is going to be a hassle to do. It doesn’t matter how big or small, and it doesn’t matter what’s stopping you. What is that one thing? And what are you doing to change that?

Something small: We’ve been talking about buying a freezer for the basement since we moved into our house in June. Jen and I both want more room to store stuff throughout the winter. I also would like to buy certain foods, like meat and frozen fruit, in bulk to save money. But, I’ve been procrastinating for a few reasons. First, since moving our monthly expenses have doubled as we buy stuff we need to get settled. And I thought this was an expense we could at least push off, and help spread out our spend. Second, I’m not sure which size to get, where I want to buy it, or what brand. Should I buy it new, or find a used one on a marketplace like Craigslist, and save some money? More of an excuse that could be decided with a little research. But, I’ve nevertheless just been stalling.

Something big: In 2020 while sitting home like everyone else I got my personal training certification. Fitness is the thing I know and love, so it made sense to pursue some type of career in this industry. Becoming a personal trainer also made sense because there are such low barriers to entry. And as I approach year 6 of being “unemployed” it’s felt like a good entry point. But it is now 2024, and I have yet to train one person. I go back and forth in my head of whether or not I actually want to train people one on one. On the one hand, I envision this great little business where I have a bunch of awesome clients who I get to help and share all of my knowledge of health and fitness with. And they in turn share their experiences with me and help me grow. On the other hand, I envision being drained of my energy by needy clients who don’t follow what I tell them to do. Feeling like a constant nag. In one vision I love it, and in the other I hate it. And the result is zero progress.

I’ve made two small commitments to try and turn inaction into action.

The freezer: Two weeks ago I took a drive to a small town in the mountains near our home. I didn’t have anything to do and there was a small food coop, so I popped in to see what they have (I can’t resist a good hippie owned food store). They had these frozen sockeye salmon filets that were the most beautiful things I’d seen when it comes to frozen fish. I bought one and cooked it for the first time the other day, and I immediately knew I wanted to have these all the time. So, I went onto the distributors website and found that the only option was a 25 lb case of frozen fillets. I ordered them. I now NEED a freezer before they arrive.

Personal training: A couple of months ago Jen and I got the idea that we should start a small gardening company. So, I immediately when onto Canva to design and order business cards. They arrived quickly and Jen posted a handful on the bulletin board at the garden center where she works. Two weeks ago we got our first job, and subsequently handed out more cards. I realized that without something tangible, this was just an idea. But once we got the business cards it felt real and like we were committed to making it happen. So, last week I went back onto Canva to design and order business cards for my personal training practice. They arrived two days ago. Now it feels real. Now it feels like I’m committed. If I don’t follow through and hand them out, it will only be because I’m afraid to. And I have a rule in life. When something feels scary, it’s usually the thing I should be doing.

I have this theory that I feel like cant just be a theory. It’s that most of us have one or two things on our mind that we need to do and we’re not doing. One or two things that are in our way, and preventing us from reaching our full potential. They could be really small, like say going to the DMV to get your license or car registration renewed. Or they could be really big, like staying at your job that you hate. But, I want to focus on the small stuff because I think that’s the stuff that clogs up our lives the most.

There’s two things that I always think about. First, until I do that “thing” (i.e. go to the DMV), I won’t have room for the next thing to enter my conscious. So, I’ll be stuck on “DMV.” The second is more conscious. If you can’t take yourself to get to the DMV, then what are the chances you’re going to leave your job. On a sub-conscious level, if you can’t do the small thing, there’s no way you’ll have the confidence to do the big one.

I believe that within all of us a path has been laid that will lead us to our greatest potential. And I think it’s guided by our intuition. There’s a quote I heard for the first time recently, but now keeps showing up in my life.

“What you seek is seeking you” - Rumi. I believe that to be true.

Our intuition is that nagging voice that keeps reminding us of the things we need to do. Our resistance is the second voice we hear, filling our head with excuses and reasons not to listen to our intuition. And every time we get hung up on a task, it prevents us from moving forward on our path.

Our intuition isn’t always right. The path isn’t straight. But it’s the best guide we have to living our best life and reaching our full potential.

How often do we try to avoid the thing we need?

I wanted to go for a walk during a break at my conference, and put a granny smith apple in my car for the drive home. One path, a direct line to my car, was where the videographer was interviewing people on camera. I could’ve avoided being in the picture and went straight for my car, but I remembered from the day before that he had asked people to stay away. So, I obliged. 

The other path to my car was lined with a group of women from the conference. They were sitting in a circle under a tree, chatting it up. I didn’t have it in me to pass by them and possibly get roped into a conversation (two days of a conference will make you want some time alone), so at first I hesitated, and then I decided to go anyway. 

At the same time a good looking middle aged guy with long blonde hair, looking like real salt of the earth, walked over to them and offered them something. Not wanting to be solicited, and again wanting to be alone, I thought about changing course. 

But, I fought the urge, and I decided, better to just go and see what happens. There was no other way to my car without making it very obvious I was trying to avoid everyone.

I ended up meeting Josh. An amazing human being exuding tons of positive energy. The granny smith apple in my hand caught his attention because he had picked them the day before with a friend, along with two baskets of plums that were made available to everyone at the conference.

He immediately asked “and what’s your name?” and we struck up a conversation.

He started reading the tattoo on my right forearm that is written in classical Tibetan. A language that I would assume less than 1% of the population could read, let alone identify. It turns out Josh learned San Script and Tibetan during his time in Nepal with the Peace Corps.

Back from helping humans in foreign countries, he’s an arborist “healing trees from human problems.”

When he asked me what I did, and I didn’t have a direct answer for him (see Mismanaged Moments, lying about my job), he interpreted what I was trying to say. “You’re trying to figure out how to speak your truth.”

Our encounter only lasted a few moments, but in those few moments I felt this renewed sense of energy and confidence, because this man who I had never met before managed to make me feel loved, accepted, and put a smile on my face. 

My intuition, my energy, was pulling me down the path towards Josh. My resistance was saying “don’t go that way! You want to be alone right now.” That’s the tricky thing about the resistance. Most of the times the resistance sounds logical, and more than not it will tell you the thing you want to hear. The thing that will make your life feel easier.

Discerning between intuition and resistance I think is the battle we all face every day. I’m glad I got this one right, and I got to meet Josh.

Mismanaged Moments

I think it’s important to realize that we have more time than we think. Not in life, but in moments throughout our life. We’re always rushing between tasks, afraid that if we take that extra second, everything will go to shit. But when you don’t take that extra second to tell your girlfriend she’s beautiful, or you rush through a meal, is precisely when shit starts to fall a part. Our lives are filled with mismanaged moments that we have the time for.

---

The thing I lie the most about is my job. What I do for work, which is another way of asking “how do you make money?” I hate being asked this question, because I don’t have a formal source of income, and I hate telling people that.

To me, when someone hears that I’m not working, haven’t worked in 6 years, and I’m under 40, they either think I’m rich, or that I live on a trust fund or some form of inheritance. No one has ever said that, but that’s my suspicion. Something on their face gives me that feeling.

So, more often than not, I lie. And, depending on who it is, depends on the lie.

If it’s a service man, like an electrician, the internet guy, or a furniture delivery, I usually say I’m a healthcare consultant. Which to me, isn’t totally a lie. In my head its true. Even though I don’t actually do consulting work in healthcare, I could. I have the experience.

But, if I’m talking to a more fitness or outdoor focused person, say someone I met on a hike, I usually say I work in fitness, without much description. To which most people just assume I mean personal trainer. Which, again, I could be. I have the certification, and I definitely have the experience. But, I’m not a personal trainer.

But in situations when there’s a good chance I’m going to see the person again, I tell them at least part of the truth. “I’m not working right now,” is a response I like to give. Which, prompts two responses. Person A assumes I got laid off, and gives me an empathic “sorry” look. Person B thinks I’m just starting a sabbatical, puts on a big smile, and says “thats awesome, good for you.”

Rarely ever do I tell anyone that it’s been 6 years since I held a formal full-time job. People’s heads explode. They’re not sure how to process someone not working that’s under the age of 40. Some people throw a look of “lazy generation.” Others, genuine disappointment. But some people are genuinely excited for you.

And to those people, I’ll tell the whole truth

It’s harder than you might think to not work for 6 years in your 30s. To not get sucked back up into the beast to chase money and promotions. But what’s harder is the feeling of being judged for it. No one could understand my reasons. I barely can. So, I’d rather keep them to myself.

But just today I realized at least in part why I never worked while I was living in Los Angeles. Because although I thought that’s why I was going there, what I realize now is that working was not the reason. The reason I went to Los Angeles was to find myself. To explore unhindered by responsibility, accountable to no one by myself, and see what happens. See if out alone in the world I sank, or swam, and the type of person I became. That was my job during those three years.

---

There is no good or bad advice. But the problem with advice is that it’s usually something that worked for that person. And since it worked for them, we assume it’ll work for us. And when it doesn’t, we mark it as a failure, and assume again, but this time that we are not capable.

Not realizing that there is a path out there for us, and we have to keep searching. Even if its not their path, you have one. And in the search for your path, you learn things.

You learn what you like, and what you don’t. What you’re good ati, and what you’re not. What frustrates you, or makes you feel angry, and about makes you hpayy and feel joyous.

And you go through your day getting rid of the bad, to make more room for the good. And thats your path to glide towards on you’re way to everything you ever wanted.

---

I think the thing that’s been interesting me the most recently is this behavior we all have where we shut down our thoughts. We say we want to do something, and then right behind it we blurt out an excuse not to. “I’m just going to get a canned response anyway. Better not to send my feedback.”

We all do it all the time. I’ve been doing it for awhile, and I still do it a lot. But accepting my first voice, is a practice that I continue to work on.

Listen to the people around you. Listen to them tell you about something you want, and then just as quickly shut it down. Then listen to yourself the next time you tell yourself you want something. And pay attention to the thought right after it. A reason not to.

It’s been fascinating to me because I’ve learned that when I’m listening to that first voice. That first gut reaction. My instinct. I flow from one thing to the next without hesitation. But the second I interrupt it, its like a train wreck with a 200 car pileup. Everything after it becomes seemingly more difficult.

I used to think that once that train rolled off the tracks that that was it. That was my fate for the rest of the day. The week. Sometimes the month, as one challenging thing after the next would pop up. But I’ve also learned that it’s possible to put the train back on the tracks.

And all it takes is putting a stake in the ground, and declaring that from this moment forward, you’re going to follow that voice. And it all falls back in line.

If you have no idea what I’m talking about, just observe the people around you. Observe your own thoughts. See if you can notice some sort of self-limiting talk keeping people from pursuing what they want.

But that’s why everyone needs at least one person in their life who tells them to go for it. And not in the way that your mom might say, “yea, you should do it.” But in a way that makes you believe it’s possible. Maybe it’s a close friend. A business partner. Your significant other. Everyone needs an advocate. A supporter, that tells them why they HAVE to do it, and WHY they CAN.

But I’ve realized with myself that the reason I often dismiss that first voice is because of fear. I don’t trust myself. I don’t trust that the advice I’m giving me is the right thing for me. That there is probably something I should be doing (that “should” word again. A bad word in my vocabulary). So, I push that voice aside and think about what I should be doing, which never works out well.

If I instead tell myself to have confidence. To believe in myself that I do know what’s best for me. That I can make it happen, and that the path being laid out by my intuition is the right one, then more often than not I find success, OR I can pivot quickly towards success.

Because let’s face it. Intuition isn’t 100% correct. Nothing is 100% correct in life. But it’s right more often than it’s not, and when you’re dialed into it, even if it leads you down the wrong path, you’re able tap into it fast and say “how do we get out of here.”