Taking a few days off after a few months on

As is usually the case, immediately after publicly proclaiming something, I stop doing it and change course. I said I’d been working out 7 days a week for a few months now, and I’ve been able to because I’ve been doing a good job of modulating the intensity and variety of my workouts. And that’s all true. This has been the longest I can remember that I’ve been able to go without a rest day in a long time. Maybe in my life. But, almost as quickly as I spoke those words the streak came to an end.

Saturday the toll of all those months finally caught up with me, and Sunday was more of the same feelings of fatigue and lack of motivation. So I took Saturday and Sunday off from exercise (and as I sit here writing this on Monday I still haven’t worked out). In the last two days the only physical activities I did were chores around the house or in the garden. But other than that I mostly just relaxed. No formal workouts.

All of a sudden it hit me that I had been go, go, go, not letting anything get in the way of my workouts. Not travel. Not commitments. Not fatigue, soreness, or pain. Not lack of time. Everyday I figured out a way to moderate the intensity and duration in order to make it work. And for the most part, I felt really good throughout the streak. Until I didn’t.

Part of what changed I think is the additional work we’ve been doing in the garden to get ready for the spring and summer season. It feels like I had just been teetering on the edge for awhile, and that extra load, things like moving dirt, was enough to put me over. The work required that little bit of time and energy I had on reserve to get me through to the next day, and after a few days there was nothing left.

If I really think about it and reflect, I also realize that for days preceding this, I was starting to get into a rut. There were multiple days over the last couple of weeks when I pushed my workouts back to later in the day. Morning workouts became afternoon workouts. Afternoon workouts became evening workouts. I just didn’t have the same motivation or energy when I woke up, so I kept delaying them until just before it was too late.

But the biggest indicator, that came on fast, was an inability to sleep two nights in a row. During the months of daily workouts my sleep had never been an issue. I would fall asleep almost as quickly as my head hit the pillow, and wake up 8 hours later. But Friday and Saturday night were filled with tossing and turning. Waking up to my heart racing. Unable to get comfortable and constantly overheating. Classic signs that my nervous system was on over drive and unable to shutoff. 

I was sad to end the streak, but the fact that I did marks a big accomplishment for me, and hopefully a turning point. All of these signs and signals are great if you pay attention to them and take them seriously. But they are useless if ignored. And typically I ignored them. Always choosing instead to push on one more day, then one more day after that, picking an arbitrary day in the future to take some rest, only to push past that day too once it arrived.

More typically it wasn’t until either injury, illness, or burn out ensued, that forced me to take days off because I physically and mentally could not put in another day. But the problem with that is by that point I was way past the point of rest and recovery, and instead I needed time to legitimately heal. A seemingly slight distinction that is vastly different.

By being able to dial it back before injury or illness, in just a couple of days I already feel my body being replenished. My muscles feel fuller. More vascular. My mind is at ease. My body is responding. I did the had thing (for me). A small win, but huge in the grand scheme of my mindset and where I am on my journey. It’s really the place I’ve been trying to get to for almost 8 years. In tune and receptive to what I need versus what I want.

The anxiety I have now is how many days will I take off? I’m loving the gains I’ve made over the last few months. How strong I feel. How good I like, and I don’t want to jeopardize that progress with too much time away. But, I also don’t want to kick back into gear until I’m ready and recovered. Because I know that rushing back too soon has the potential to inhibit future growth and undo some of the progress I’ve made. So I’m telling myself that I will play it by ear, and again let my body tell me when. And for now filling the void I feel with a focus on mobility, gardening, and mostly rest.