Standing up and inspiring others to stand up too
Sometimes it takes the actions of one brave person to inspire people around them. One person doing the right thing, standing up for what’s right, can excite a crowd to speak up and do the same.
This past weekend in Austin, TX, my fiancée, father in law, and I, stood outside of Jeni’s Ice Cream on South Congress, eating ice cream, when we heard someone screaming at the top of their lungs. I looked around to see where it was coming from, but despite it sounding like the person was right next to me, I didn’t see anyone. A few seconds later, a white woman in her early 60s, with blond hair, wearing a black San Antonio Spurs hat, stumbled out of the car parked in front of us.
As she tried to walk along the sidewalk it was clear she was wasted. Her legs kept failing her the way a boxer’s does after they’ve been knocked out. It looked like she was going to fall over at any minute. She was making her way towards her friend, a woman of about the same age, with brown hair, dressed like she just came from an office job somewhere. They had apparently gotten separated at some point. She was equally as drunk.
Reunited, they both got in the car, at which point we all realized that she was about to drive, and there was no way she could. We all looked at each other, understanding that we had to do something to stop her. I went over to the passenger side and told the woman that her friend could not drive. As drunk as she was, she seemed to agree, and got out of the car. She stood outside the car with the door open and told her friend she couldn’t drive. But the driver, in slurred english, kept telling her to stop and get in the car.
By this time a guy waiting online for ice cream came walking over. He had heard the yelling and was watching the commotion and wanted to know what was going on and if he could help. We explained the situation, and immediately he said “I’ll just take her keys.” And with that, he pushed past the lady by the passenger door, reached over and took the keys out of the ignition, and absorbed a backhand punch to the face from the driver in the process. He walked back over to us and put the key in his pocket.
After some discussion, and agreeing that it would be hours before this lady would sober up enough to drive, we decided to call the police, and leave the key with staff at the ice cream shop. We thanked him and left a few minutes later.
Even though we knew we were doing the right thing, interfering in these two women’s live felt uncomfortable. It was challenging. Is this my business to get involved in? was the question that kept repeating in my head. And every time I asked myself that question I would envision the scene that would unfold if we let her drive away. Getting side swiped or t-boned as she pulled out onto South Congress. Hitting some kids, a family, a mother, brother, father, crossing the street. Crashing into a phone pole. And it made me more and more emboldened to stop her. But the thing that changed everything, was another stranger getting involved and confirming our position by his show of action. Having someone else who was also willing to do something, made all the uneasiness go away. It was no longer just us, we had an ally.
And while I cannot sit here and stay I would have had the balls or even the idea to take her car keys away, I think we still played a role. By being willing to confront the situation in the first place, we created an opportunity for someone else to step up as well. By showing our stance, we were able to create a coalition, and together stop something terrible from happening.
That’s just a small example, but it’s something we’ve all been seeing play out on a global scale recently. As more and more countries considered allies refuse to participate in the U.S. and Israeli war on Iran, it creates space for other countries to do the same. First Spain took a stand, refusing to be involved and calling out the actions of the U.S. exactly as they saw them. As illegal and unjust. Then Italy took a stand, and refused to allow the U.S. to use their airspace and military base in Sicily. Subsequently France took a similar position, and the U.K. reiterated that it would only pursue a diplomatic path to ending hostilities. And the more countries that are willing to put that uncomfortable feeling aside, and do the right thing, the easier it will be for others to do the same, and together prevent something terrible from happening.
It can be scary to speak out when everyone around you is silent or complicit. It can be even harder when those people or countries are considered friends and allies. But its always remarkable to see how many people feel the same way once the bubble is popped. People in general want to do good, but are sometimes just too scared to get involved until they know they’ll have support. We were going to a protest recently and Jen went to FedEx to print posters for us. When the girl working there saw what she was printing she told Jen there was no charge. She couldn’t be out protesting, and this was her way of supporting us. It just reinforces the power that comes from standing up and speaking out. There are more of us out there than we think.